His Love Defined

This is an excerpt explained from Steve Harvey's new book, "Act like a Lady, Think like a Man."

It's no secret that men love differently from women. As Steve Harvey puts it,"[n]othing on this planet can compare with a woman's love-it is kind and compassionate, patient and nurturing, generous and sweet and unconditional. Pure." He goes on to say that if you are a woman's man she will take care of you and stand by you until the end.

A man, however, loves in three SIMPLE ways.

He Professes: Simply put, he claims you. When you are introduced, he might say something to the effect of this is __________ my girlfriend, wife, woman, lady, etc. He is proud that he has you by his side. This is also his way of telling other guys, "Hey man, stay away, she's mine." If you are simply introduced by your name or not at all, this should maybe raise some red flags.

He Provides: This might be a difficult thing to evaluate if you don't live together or don't make very much money...but your man should want you to have everything you need. If you don't, he will do his best to provide it for you or improvise until he can. He wants you to be happy and well taken care of.

He Protects: "When a man truly loves you, anybody who says, does, suggests, or even thinks about doing something offensive to you stands the risk of being obliterated." That's a given. But he doesn't have to use physical force or words to protect you. He could also do this by giving you advice or doing a task he thinks might be too dangerous for you.

According to Mr. Harvey, "[i]f you've got a man who does these things for you, trust me, he's all in."


Are things starting to make sense for you? This is about the part where I started evaluating my past relationships. It really sheds some light on things. What I hope to gain from this book is the ability to not make excuses for a guy and not waste time. The way I see it, it's okay if the man you're with or going to be with doesn't mesh with you. There isn't any reason to have hard feelings...just realize this before you settle, get comfortable, and stay way longer than you should.

Coming up I will let you in on what Steve says that men need from us, what to do/say instead of having 'talks,' and the throw-backs vs. the keepers (and he's talking about women here.)